A Tail of Woe

As far as near death experiences go, I suppose I’ve had my fair share. I do not believe that I am reckless or foolhardy, yet I do tend to blunder through life in a very perilous fashion. Why, just this year I have narrowly escaped a kite malfunction; an insect harassment syndicate and most recently a number of harrowing bird attacks. Whilst the risk of death would appear to increase out-of-doors, it is by no means confined to plein air pursuits.

After last month's ‘Close Encounters of the Hitchcock Kind’, I solemnly vowed to stay indoors, at least for a few weeks and partake of some light studio work and maybe catch up on my reading.

Early Tuesday morning, the start of a most glorious day, Carrie said she was going outside to do a spot of gardening and agreed to leave me in charge of the studio. I happily pottered about finding plenty to keep me occupied, I sorted wayward beads, stacked paper offcuts and even wrestled with a USB cable. Very rewarding work.

Being a most diligent mouse, I finished my chores rather early and decided to stroll around the workshop admiring the backdrops and stage props Carrie was currently working on. One item in particular caught my eye, it was a miniature green scooter. I marvelled at its design and must have circumnavigated the machine at least three times before I felt a very unpleasant sensation.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

Hitchcockatoo

Midnight:
A most ghastly cry pierces the night. I lay in bed motionless, eyes wide, heart racing. What was that noise? Did I dream it? Yes, I must have. Nothing sounds like that. Maybe I’m still dreaming! Yes, that’s it, I’m still drea—

“Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehh”

 

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

Up, Up and Away

Many humans find it hard to believe that mice partake in recreational activity and to be honest I am at a loss as to why this is. To assume that we are simple creatures with simple needs, well that is just not the case. In truth we are an adventurous bunch. Think back to the cartoons you watched as a child…mice were never portrayed doing simple things, no, we were mischievous, daring and cunning.

With that in mind, it is not entirely inconceivable that I might wish to do something sporty once in a while, like, fly a kite. A thing I have not done since I was a pup and a most pleasing way to spend a Sunday afternoon.

Of course with no kite to hand and no stores nearby, I had to improvise. I raided Carrie’s studio for paper offcuts, along with wood, twine and glue. I laid several of the components out, but soon realised I needed a little help with the finer points of kite construction. Therefore, I did what anyone would do in a time of crisis, I went online.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

Bergamot and the Cabbage

Having been confined to the house for more than a month, it pleases me to say that I’ve gained much of my strength back and feel like my old self again. From menial household chores to studio graft, I have rebuilt many of my old muscles and gained a fair few more!

Yesterday, as a way of easing me back out of doors, Carrie suggested I take a walk around the garden - on the condition that I stay close to the house, so she could keep an eye on me. She forgets that I am a worldly mouse, having seen and done much, but I indulge her out of respect because I know she means well and because I’m a little afraid of what might happen if I don't.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

The Paper Prince

Hi Everyone, it’s Bergamot here. Sorry I haven’t written for a while. Thank you to all who sent their warm wishes and ‘get well’ messages, Carrie read them to me whilst I was in bed. They made me so happy! I particularly liked the one that recommended chilli sausages as the perfect winter cold remedy. I must try that..........

....... These past few days I've been on studio duties, busying back and forth, helping Carrie with her bookbinding. She has put me in charge of the 'Detail Division', entrusted with tasks such as measuring, cutting and gluing, all of which require finesse and precision. As the saying goes 'measure once, cut twice'. I think I have a knack for this.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

Meltdown Manor

Hi, it’s Carrie here. I’m filling in for Bergamot while he takes some time to recover. Don’t worry, everything’s alright. You see, since his last entry Bergamot has had something of a minor meltdown. To be honest I think this chilly weather has got the better of him and he just needs some time to rest.

I had an inkling all was not well when he stormed out during our game of ‘charades’ last week. His melodramatic exit was quite unlike him, although in his defence, Andy’s attempt to act out the movie “Interstellar” by peering through a bookcase for 10 minutes was rather painful. Nonetheless, I am still speculating whether cats understand the space/time continuum better than we do. I digress.

Upon returning from his scavenger hunt I assumed Bergamot was his perky old self. He was so proud of the various goodies he’d found: furniture, appliances, hardware and knick-knacks. He spent that whole evening and the next day arranging and rearranging his corner of the room to accommodate these newfound belongings. It wasn’t until the following morning I knew something was very wrong.

Overwhelmed by the sheer quantity of items he had scavenged, Bergamot sat huddled against a tiny dresser, quietly fretting.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

Scavenger Hunt

The sudden onset of winter which caught me out last week has continued to wreak havoc. Whilst I consider myself an ‘all weathers’ kind of mouse, one must draw a line at venturing out in gale force winds and horizontal rain. For small creatures especially, conditions such as these can prove treacherous. Thus, I was forced to spend a while cooped up in the house, admiring the weather from afar.

The first two days were quite pleasurable. I did a spot of reading, some tidying up and in the evenings Andy and I re-enacted scenes from Wuthering Heights (for once I got to play Cathy). I even enjoyed re-runs of TV cooking shows, though in hindsight I recognise this was probably the start of my unravelling. By day three the Monopoly Board made an appearance and so did my petulance. Charades finally tipped me over the edge.

You see, when unable to roam freely I get quite agitated, I feel hot and bothered, my legs grow twitchy and I can’t sit still or get comfy. So, deciding to jeopardise my safety over my friendship, I waited for a dry spell, grabbed my car keys and took off.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

Winter Is Coming

Mother Nature pulled a fast one on me this week. You see, from what I can gather, we seem to have skipped autumn and plunged straight into winter! This morning I woke to a set of ice-encrusted whiskers, numb paws and a blue tail. Not a great way to start the day. It took me the best part of an hour to defrost on the windowsill. Thankfully I had Andy nestled beside me for company, although his choice of reading material, 'The Long Winter', was questionable to say the least.

Once limber, I set about unpacking my scarf, earmuffs and slippers in an effort to make the next few months tolerable and avoid impersonating a frozen mouse-icle each and every morning. Please understand me, I wish not to complain about the cold, I'm simply commenting on the surprising speed with which the seasons changed and on my apparent unpreparedness.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

A Rant and a Ramble

This week I received a visit from my cousin, Lord Bramble. Bramble is not a real ‘Lord’ by the way! I feel I should point that out. You see, our family titles are simply acronyms for our various occupations and talents. Whilst I am an Earl (Environmental Appreciation of Rural Lands), Bramble is a Lord (Latent Obsessive Rambling Disorder). Simply put, he likes to wander.
    
We’ve been friends since childhood, where we spent many weekends foraging andexploring the woodland around our village. Rummaging through the densest undergrowth and the thickest hedgerows, we became quite skilled at sourcing sweet treats and Bramble had a real knack for finding the juiciest berries, however well concealed. It was on one of these jaunts that everything changed.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

Friend and Foe

I’m an outdoorsy type. Whilst not opposed to the creature comforts of indoor living (I am as easily seduced by a comfy armchair as the next mouse), I do however need to venture out-of-doors every once in a while and get my paws dirty.

As beautiful as this spot is, my preliminary findings reveal the insect to mammal ratio is at least 3000:1, which is not ideal for exploring, in my opinion. Unlike other mice I get a little jittery around bugs, especially the carnivorous ones and here there appears to be no other sort.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

The Art of Photobombing

As you know I’m staying a while with my good friend Carrie. She is an artist and is always busy making something-or-other. Therefore, in an effort to make myself useful I’ve been helping out in the studio as there’s always plenty to do.

I usually spend time at the table, a large wooden surface littered with wool, yarn, paper, pens and tea cups. It’s not the tidiest of work spaces, however, she claims it is an ‘organised mess’, but I’m not so sure. My mouse family pride themselves on neatness and tidiness and some days I worry that being exposed to this much mess will trigger my OCD again.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1. 

Let The Blogging Begin

Hello? Can you see me? Hi! My name is Bergamot and yes, I am a mouse. My friend Carrie might have mentioned me already, I’ve come to stay with her for a while. It’s very nice to be here.

Of course I am trying to be the best house guest possible and have been helping out wherever I can. Thus far I’ve proven myself to be a great asset with the smaller chores such as needle threading and crumb collection. I have however encountered a few sticky situations, most notably the time I sat on an off-cut of packing tape and gave myself an unintended wax.

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The full version of this story is available in
'BERGAMOT, EARL OF GREY' VOLUME 1.